After galavanting around the fourth dimension entirely, I retired.
I made a parody of my adventures in a video documenting one last hop, from 2009 to 2008. Knowing about my fixed plot points, I posted the video to my roommate's YouTube account. I'd be deleting my Google account at the end of 2020. I need the receipt at a time later than now.
However, at this time, I have been authorized to publish my research, unredacted.
The Passage of Time
Time moves at exactly two speeds simultaneously. Your current passage through time is bound to the spectrum you're observing.
Scientifically, time moves at the rate of light. This has been proven by the fiber optics that deliver Netflix to your optics in lab-like environments. Currently, that's on a gigabit line through an M1 Macbook Pro and straight to the face.
Observationally, time moves at the rate that grass grows. Slow and steady. Blink and it'll still be there just as it was yesterday. With regard to technology, this is like buffering a chat application on a flip phone with a spotty dial-up connection. A reality for some of the world and an impossible dream for the vast majority.
Specifics on Time Travel
It always happens in an elevator. By definition, an elevator is an apparatus of suspension.
Were a hotel to have thirteen floors, it would have thirteen elevators: one per floor. If all elevators were present, it would restrict the motion required to transport objects in the apparatus. To leave room for one elevator to move freely at the rate of time, the other twelve elevators exist in a different time.
One might be quick to observe that traditionally, an elevator has cables and pulleys and a counter weight. A naive hypothesis might be to correlate these accessories as necessary to transport the apparatus across a vertical plane. The scientific law of common elevators states these accessories are more energy efficient than leaving the apparatus to harness their natural power source to traverse a singular plane.
There are billions of people on earth. Were they all to time travel, there would be little historical context for the basis of our reality. We've discovered elevators to be an over-engineered solution.
Fiscally, we've over-invested in their development and deployment. Nearly every building on earth five stories or taller, contains an elevator shaft.
It is important to note, elevators were not originally designed for time travel. The initial drafts outlined their primary usage to be for traversing space.
Think about our thirteen floored hotel. The shaft was originally designed to be more like a docking bay. You could visit a friend anywhere in the world, at the speed of light. Just step across the threshhold of the chamber lock, into an elevator, and shortly after step across the threshold of the next chamber lock.
In practice, people were discovered to be more anti-social than originally hypothesized. This led to jams. Shafts would remain full, while transports would be caught in suspension waiting for a dock.
We knew this was a possibility, but assumed that people would be in constant flight, leaving a buffer window of no more than ten seconds. We even coded the doors to shut and open more slowly to account for this delay for a seamless experience.
I digress. With these jams, we were faced with a dilemma. My team was clever, we knew we could puzzle our way out of it.
In the blink of an eye, as if the answer had been there all along, we fixed the issue. We left one elevator per shaft and the remaing elevators in a different time, ready to be summoned for passage.
Occasionally, elevators will go missing. Their ability to traverse time and space is succinctly powerful. To do so untethered from the rest of the network is plainly untrackable.
Well, besides the ripples caused by the phreaks that operate them.
Our Current Timeline
Enough about my credentials. The matter at hand is that the origins of elevators have been made obsolete by modern society.
This is perfectly acceptable and normal. Technological progress ebbs and flows. Elevators were needed in a time before instant communication was able to fit in your pocket.
The problem does come down to debate between the public and private sector. You see, elevators were funded privately, but the original benefactors licensed the technology for public use: all entities welcome.
As alternative communication technology emerged, the elevators found less use. Why spend ten minutes walking to the nearest shaft to then walk another ten minutes to visit your friend only to find out they weren't home? That's unnecessary with a phone! Pick it up, dial your friend, chat a bit, and still have ten minutes to spare!
Sure. This sounds great in a leaflet. However, the fine print is that telephony is privatized. As a result, the economy of communication has been over-inflated into a relatively tiny number of hands.
In turn, this financial advantage was leveraged to create an even larger moat. While elevators were public transport for private passengers, it wasn't exclusive. Cars were designed. Critics said they'd never stand a chance against elevators, as they were inferior in every objective way.
Subjectively though, they were fun. The driver was in control. They could choose how to traverse space. They could make a pit stop anywhere in the world. It was expensive, but it was theirs.
This resulted in the sale and purchase of many, many cars around the world. Their cities sprawled into suburbs and their suburbs sprawled into country living. The fringes were forced to homestead.
All this to say, the distance from the farthest reaches to an elevator is a several day journey. The phone service at this range is not laboratory grade. It is about the rate at which grass grows.
The thing that gets us to the next thing
Elevators paved the way for phones, which paved the way for cars, which ultimately resulted in a need for us to redesign elevators.
The latest version of an elevator can run on any electronic device, granted administrative priveleges. The primary difference between a standard elevator and this digital elevator is that it cannot transport your whole body. Instead, it transports only your mind.
Each elevator is capable of peering with other elevators. That's to say, their is no heirarchy. Metaphorically, your mind travels across, but never through.
I know you and you know me. You can introduce me to friends and you can know my friends too. If we fall apart, our other relationships remain.
This ground breaking elevator of the mind technology is being actively developed in the current present and in a transparent fashion. All entities are welcome to participate and encouraged to contribute. If you can't find your way, reach out to me.
It is worth noting. Phones currently have an advantage, especially since I accelerated their advent and therefore patents to be established before the discovery of elevators. That's just a minor hiccup though.
In the grand-scheme, time is self-healing. While we had to take a bit of the long way round this go, we will be at the next future sooner rather than later.
Be ready for it when it comes. Blink and you will miss it.