Eating Elephants

They say one bite at a time, but that's too easy to give up.

“I tried elephant once; I didn't like it.”

I don't want to speculate, but I will wager the meal wasn't prepared by Chef Ramsey.

So if eating an elephant one bite at a time is difficult and then even more difficult by choosing a quality cut and prep, how does one eat an elephant?

A lifestyle change. A new default.

“Elephants? Yeah, for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.”

You don't eat anything except elephants. No need to provide estimates. You'll eat elephants like steady state cardio with practice.

Not only will you be great at eating elephants, you'll be great at identifying, tracking, hunting, cleaning, cooking, preserving, and conserving them.

Everything else in your life will suffer as a result though. Do not actually eat elephants. I knew this dude once that just saw pink elephants and tripped balls for weeks. Cannot imagine what eating one would do. I guess if you're going to eat elephants, just avoid the pink ones.

But yeah, one bite at a time will never cut it. Live and breathe eating those elephants. You need to want it. No one will force you to eat an elephant.

If you find that you need an elephant eaten, but don't want to commit yourself to the endeavor, hire me. Trust me, I'm a professional.